To A Fault
by Takhrenixe
Summary: Shadow thought he'd done the right thing. He really, really did. But when it comes to loved ones, there is such a thing as being selfless to a fault... Sonadow; don't like, keep your muzzle out of it.


**Once more I find myself faced with the difficulty of trying to put a vividly detailed dream into words. Hopefully I didn't fail at it. I think it's kind of good...probably the best Sonadow I've done so far. But that's just me being hopeful.  
So! Read, review (PLEASE), fave, all that jazz and a bag of Cheetos. Or something like that. xD**

**Dedicated to Element Eighty, because she's an awesome friend and the only person I know who's as much of an avid Sonadowshipper as me. So here's to you, Double E! -Nix**

_**To A Fault**_

_Shadow..._

A small blue Hedgehog lay curled into a ball on the corner of his equally blue bed. Night had long since come, making the furry virtually disappear among the sea of linen, only noticable by the faint glint of his deadly-pale jade eyes as they stared listlessly at his bedroom door.

_Shadow..._

He-Sonic the Hedgehog-wanted nothing in the world more than for a certain other Hedgie to walk through that door. The other could even Chaos Control themself right in without using it; Sonic didn't care, he just wanted him back.

_Shadow...why did you leave?_

Even thinking that name tore him to shreds; he pulled himself in tighter, weak sobs muffled by a mountain of azure fur.

_Was it my fault? Did you leave because of me?_

Secretly, Sonic didn't even know why he bothered with that particular question. 'Of course it was', he told himself, 'I'm the only one he ever talked to, or spoke to, or even looked at. It can only be my fault.'

_...I'm sorry. If you knew that, would you come back?_

If the old Sonic could have seen the way he was acting, he would most likely have broken the-locked-door down, stomped in, launched into a reprimand, slapped himself in the face, and told himself to get up off his sorry ass and get over it because Shadow was _not_ coming back, no matter how long he waited or how much he cried. But the old Sonic was all but gone, a mere shadow (oh, hardy _har_) of what he used to be and decidedly wouldn't ever be again if that damned black-and-red Hedgehog didn't walk in and start yelling at him for being such a softy.

_Shadow...please..._

"Chaos damn it, why are you doing this?"

Sonic nearly fell off the bed at hearing his own voice, barely audible though it was; he hadn't spoken a word for weeks, his throat too raw and painful from screaming every night, when he'd wake up and see that his counterpart still hadn't returned.

_Please...please, please, oh Chaos please just come back...!_

"Shadow, please! Please come back, please, don't leave me alone...SHADOW!"

He felt warmth trickle down the inside of his throat, realizing it was bleeding; paying it no mind, he took a shaky breath that dissolved into more silent sobs.

"I don't care...what you think you've done...I don't care if it's my fault...I don't care why you left, just come back!"

A small scratching noise caught Sonic's attention and he snapped up to level his glassy gaze with the window, staring out into the night as burning tears he'd had no idea he still knew how to shed flowed freely, falling to the bedspread with silent _plinks_.

There was nothing in the pitch-blackness outside that he could see save for a tree, but still he stared, perhaps thinking that if he searched long enough he might find his elusive Shadow and proceed to drag him inside and never let him out of his sight again.

For hours he looked, hope fading with each passing second. Sonic was _sure_ his long-lost lookalike stood beyond that window, and it made him want to scream all the more that he just couldn't seem to see.

Suddenly his glance snapped to a certain point in the darkness. He felt absolutely certain that Shadow would teleport into view, give him one of those devil-smiles he always had on and finally end the hell that Sonic's life had become with the Ultimate Lifeform's absence, but still, after yet another hour of nothing, the Blue Blur snapped and threw the nearest thing he could find-which happened to be his alarm clock-at the unhelpful glass, shattering it into thousands of pieces and sending the clock sailing into the tree.

"The window's open now," he whispered to no one with a small, sad grin. "You can come in anytime, OK?"

Almost eerily calmed, he curled up again, drifting off to a tortured sleep with that same unnerving smile plastered on his tear-stained muzzle.

"G'night, Shads. Love you."

* * *

Shadow the Hedgehog silently cursed his choice of resting place, the bark of the branch he'd decided to sit on digging into him uncomfortably. He refrained-barely-from Chaos Blasting the overgrown bush into oblivion, reminding himself that there were no other trees anywhere near the Fox-child's workshop. Just because he'd disappeared from the lives of his friends(and a certain more-than-friend), that didn't mean he wasn't keeping a very watchful eye on them; for two years he'd observed from out of sight, all the while fighting a vicious inner battle that was forcing him, little by little, to think twice about abandoning his 'family.'

...OK, 'think twice' was an understatement. More along the lines of his conscience screaming, _W__hat in hell's name were you _thinking_, you dumbass?_

Sighing, Shadow again moved his icy gaze to the window he'd been watching for the last three hours...the window of Sonic's bedroom. Another sigh.

_"Oh, hey! Didn't expect to see you here! What's up, Shadow?"_

_"Sonic. I need to talk to you."_

_"...Huh? Somethin' wrong?"_

_"No...I wanted to tell you something."_

The Black Blur closed his eyes and shook his head wearily, wishing the memories would just leave him like they had after Rouge had awakened him from his fifty-year slumber. Figures, he thought, that when he would have given anything to have them they tried their hardest to elude him...and now that he'd give anything to forget, the damned things were back and there to stay.

_"Well, shoot, then!"_

_"I...um...I think..."_

_"Hey, you alright? Y'look like somethin's eatin' you."_

_"No it's just-Chaos, why is this so hard?"_

The faint sounds of crying reached Shadow's ear, and he had to dig his claws into the the wood supporting him to keep himself seated and not Chaos Control into that room. Again, like so many nights before, he tried to convince his mind that he _needed_ to stay away, he _had_ to, because what if Doom somehow, Chaos forbid, survived and came after him? No doubt Sonic and the rest of them would put their own asses on the line to save his. Or what if Mephiles returned? Sonic had already been murdered once by his hand(though mercifully he didn't remember it), and damned if Shadow would let history repeat itself. He knew was playing the hell out of the 'selfless hero' card, but really, he didn't think he'd be able to live with himself if anything happened-

"Chaos damnit, why are you doing this?"

Shadow just about fell from the tree in shock; how on Mobius could Sonic know he was there? Impossible! He was probably just talking to himself like he usually did nowadays...but still the Ultimate couldn't help but wonder.

_"Why's what so hard? You're not makin' any sense, man."_

_"..."_

_"Shadow-"_

_"IthinkIlikeyoubutI'!"_

_"...Whoa. Dude. I run fast, I don't talk fast. In plain Mobian, please?"_

_"I like you. A lot. That's all. I'll just go now."_

_"Shads, wait, don't."_

"Shadow, please! Please come back, please, don't leave me alone...SHADOW!"

The adressed Hedgehog winced at the shriek ending that sentence, once again having to physically restrain himself from coming to Sonic's aid.

_"...What?"_

_"Were you serious, just now? You weren't...kidding, right?"_

_"I don't 'kid', Faker."_

_"Good. 'Cuz I like you too!"_

An ivory-gloved hand rose to brush against tan lips as their owner remembered the light kiss that had followed his confession, and he shivered slightly, though cold had nothing to do with it. Shadow had been bewildered, unsure of whether the small contact had really happened or if it was simply a cruel dream. After all, everything else he'd tried to care for had been taken from him in one way or another; would it really be so surprising if that moment of pure bliss hadn't been real?

Shadow supposed he should've expected it when the Doctor tried to ruin his happiness the very next morning.

_"Shadow! You OK?"_

_"Of course I am. But what the hell happened to you?"_

_"Well, that bot was gonna crush you! What else was I supposed to do?"_

_"Stayed out of the way, that's what. You could've been killed!"_

_"Y'can't write me off that easily, dude. It's only a broken leg! I'll be fine! You should be glad I pushed you outta the way; if you'd gotten hit there wouldn't be an Egghead for us to play with anymore, you can count on that."_

_"You stubborn idiot. I'm immortal. Getting crushed wouldn't have kill me."_

_"Like it matters! Nobody hurts my friends! ...'Specially you."_

_"..."_

_"Shadow?"_

_"I'll be back later."_

He hadn't been back later. He hadn't been back ever.

For two years he'd gone, and instead of Sonic getting over it and living life, like Shadow had hoped he would, it had only gotten worse. (**A/N: Oh gods. This is starting to sound like New Moon. -dies-**)

Truth be told, after what he'd put his self-proclaimed lover through, he wasn't sure that Sonic would ever forgive him, even if he _did_ return-

"I don't care...what you think you've done...I don't care if it's my fault...I don't care why you left, just come back!"

Shadow couldn't help but let out a silent gasp at this outburst; blasted Hedgehog, did he have any idea how _hard _he was making trying to stay away?

...His foot chose that moment to slip against the branch, and the louder-than-expected scratching noise it made caused Sonic's head to snap up and look out into the dark, eyes widened by the hope that his calls had been answered. Deadened malachite searched the sky, and Shadow thanked Chaos there was no moon out that night; otherwise his two-toned pelt would be plainly visible against the browns and reds of autumn leaves.

His next breath hitched when he realized that Sonic was staring straight into his eyes; Shadow dared not move so much as a centimeter for fear the boy would see him. Hours of deathly stillness passed, and finally Sonic broke his gaze. The other Hedgehog turned to jump from the tree, but was caught off guard by a furious snarl; the next second, a deafening crash tore through the night and Shadow found Sonic's old digital clock flying at his face faster than he could dodge it. He clenched his teeth together to stop his surprised shout from escaping when it collided with him, tossing the clock away in a mix of irritation and worry. Why would Sonic do that?

"The window's open now. You can come in anytime, OK? G'night Shads. Love you."

It used up every last ounce of Shadow's self-control not to take him up on that offer.

Once more he turned to leave, but his legs refused to work right. He knew he needed to get out of there, but he couldn't help but stay. Sighing in self-defeat, he checked to make sure the Blue Blur had fallen asleep, and Chaos Controlled himself to a spot beside Sonic's bed.

His hand ghosted over the sleeping Hedgehog's cheek, and sanguine eyes shone in sadness as he noticed the trails of tears still present.

Leaning down with the utmost care not to wake him, Shadow nuzzled the cerulean furry's neck, heart breaking further when his lover unconsciously edged closer to the touch.

A flash of golden Chaos Energy lit up the room, and the echo of Shadow's farewell lingered a moment in the air like the dying clang of a funeral bell, Sonic's ear twitching slightly to show that though out cold, he'd heard.

_"Sleep well, Sonikku...I love you."_


End file.
